Whenever I'm not doing anything,I automatically think of him.He's not my boyfriend,or my brother as a matter of fact.He's my friend....or at least he says that he is. We've known each other since quite a while now and he's sweet to me.So...yea,it can be a crush. A super minor one, mind you.
So here's a thing.I have major trusting issues.I either trust a person completely or I don't at all.There's no mid way to it.And from what I've experienced,I've always trusted the wrong person.And so there's a part of me that believes that he will also leave me like everyone else did.
I've told him everything about me,my problems, short falls,and even about my trusting issues.I told him that I'm scared that he'd also leave me like everyone else did,so it'd be better if he did that now as I din't want him to be forced into any kind of stuff,but he told me that he never will.He'll always be there for me and that I won't find an escape from him that easily.
He's all supportive and kind and sweet to me,and even was when he din't know me that well.A gentleman.But a part of me feels that all this is fake. Not his behavior, I'm hell as sure that he's a gentleman.But with whats between us.Our friendship.Like he doesn't want it.This doesn't feel real.
I might as well be imagining stuff because of all my losses.But more than the others,I don't trust myself.I cant trust my life.Nothing that good ever happen to me all of a sudden,then how can this?
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